(to the tune of “Bohemian Rhapsody” and with apologies to Freddie Mercury)
Is this just fantasy?
The world is at mercy,
to the U.S. economy.
Interest rates rise,
The deficit size is keyyyyyyy!
I’m just a Banker, what will the outcome be?
If rates go up or down they go?
All new high, all new low?
Any way the rates go, does it really matter to me?
Mama, I miss Greenspan,
He used to lead the Fed,
Now his influence is dead.
Mama, the dollar’s had its run,
But now it’s being sold the other way.
Mama o-o-o ooooooooooo.
The Beige Book’s full of lies-
At least it’s Saturday tomorrow –
Market’s closed, can’t go wrong, nothing really matters.
Too late, the time has come,
my position’s on the line,
the payroll figures are in line.
Goodbye to my profit now it’s gone to low,
Gotta cut my losses out and face the truth –
(Heavy guitar burst)
The market doesn’t lie,
The Fed must wish they hadn’t moved rates at all….
(Cue long and protracted guitar solo with lead into staccato operatic section)
I see a little silhouette of Greenspan,
Bernanke, Bernanke, will you watch that old man go!
May look like Woody Allen, but sure can run economies!
I’m just a trader, nobody loves me,
He’s just a trader, works in the city,
Spare him a thought with your morning cup-o-tea-
Easy come, easy go, will my bonus overflow?